About a year ago, my partner of 24 years proposed. Being a sucker for cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies, he knew exactly what to do: propose outside the Christmas train at the Christmas village in St. Paul as it snowed. It was perfect.
After two kids, a handful of pets, multiple houses, and everything two and a half decades could throw at us, I knew our wedding celebration had to be just right. We had a guest list of nearly 200 people from across the country: Minnesota, New York, Massachusetts, California, Oregon, Virginia, New Jersey, Wisconsin, North Dakota, and North Carolina. Everyone wanted to be a part of our celebration. The main response we heard from people was, “FINALLY” and “IT IS ABOUT TIME!” – I guess that happens when you are finally marrying someone you met when you were 17!
From the start, I wanted our values to guide the planning, and I became obsessed with achieving a zero-waste wedding. Along the way, I found creative ways to save time, money, and reduce waste:
Favors
For months, I scoured my Facebook Buy Nothing group and garage sales for free or very cheap glassware. Inspired by a Pinterest idea, I decided against traditional favors that might end up in the trash. Instead, guests chose from an eclectic mix of beer mugs, wine glasses, chalices, German steins, and coffee mugs to use that evening and then take home. Some thought the idea was crazy, but it was a huge hit! Guests traded glasses and snapped selfies, and we avoided countless disposable cups. Can you believe that with 3,200 photos NONE of them were of the glassware table?! Sigh…
Invitations
We cringed at the waste and expense of traditional paper invitations. Instead, we used Canva, Google Forms, and our wedding website to email invites and collect RSVPs. It was simple, effective, and eco-friendly. This also meant that we could design invitations that were 100% our style and completely unique.
Website
We built a Squarespace website to house all the wedding details. This cut down on last-minute emails and phone calls, and no one had to worry about losing paper invites or directions.
Dinner
For both the rehearsal and wedding dinners, we told our vendors that we did not want to use single-use plastics. Leftovers were composted, and we opted for bottles of wine over boxed wine with plastic liners. Thoughtful planning made a big impact.
Location
We were fortunate to hold our wedding at a friend’s horse farm. This gave us the flexibility to decorate as we wanted, use our choice of vendors, and ensure the day truly reflected our values.
Attire
I asked my attendants to pick dresses in a specific color, leaving the fabric, style, and length up to them. For my partner’s attendants, we kept it simple with black pants and shirts—all reusable for future occasions. I know that every bride says “you can wear it again!” but in our case, they really can!
Program
Instead of printing 200 programs, we framed a single copy at the ceremony entrance in a frame and we posted it on the website. Everyone had access to it without wasting paper.
Where We Fell Short
There were areas where we didn’t quite hit the mark. Despite our best efforts, a few solo cups appeared. Still, we used far more reusable cups than disposables, and our entire wedding produced just four bags of trash. We also used glow sticks for the kids. On a dark Wisconsin horse farm, glowing children were much easier to keep track of, even if it wasn’t the most sustainable choice.
Community Support
One of the most humbling moments came from a woman I knew through local advocacy work. She offered to help with the wedding because, she said, as a chemist, she was thankful that we took a hard stance on PFAS and advocated for the community. She provided reusable plates, water jugs, glassware, table décor, and linens. She even prepped the reception area and helped with clean up. Her generosity was truly touching.
Special Clean Water Action Connections
Our wedding was enriched by meaningful connections to Clean Water Action. Nora Strande sang at the ceremony. During the rehearsal dinner, the Strande family surprised me with Amara’s prom bracelet as my “something borrowed” item to wear as I walked down the aisle. Dana Strande and my mom had plotted the surprise together. I told her I was nervous – I felt like I was wearing the queen’s jewels. Her response was, “Oh but darling, you are!” Having the Standes be a part of our wedding was so special. It really drives home that the work we do is personal. We aren’t just doing a job – we are building lifelong connections.
We were also grateful to celebrate with some of my Clean Water Action teammates. Many familiar faces you know came to support us. Our team is truly that – a team. We work hard and support each other inside and outside the Clean Water Action office.
Planning our wedding was a labor of love, grounded in our values and community. It might not have perfect for some people, but it was perfect for us.
